I have started my story 3 times. I want you to understand how a person's life, and that of their family, can be turned upside down by those 4 words.

 

This sentence is devastating to anyone that has ever been told, and you hear those words repeated over and over in your head.

 

I can tell you that from November 2017 – March 2023 were, how should I say... - FUCKING STRESSFUL.

 

The tests that I had to undergo to see what exactly what the cancer was doing to my breasts, were insane.

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Needle Biopsies: My breasts were so bruised after those tests (Yep, I was so lucky, I got to have 2.) I had bruises before; however, I don't think I have ever seen such a vivid color of purple, blue, red, green, and yellow on my body. The simple and easy form of love and comfort of “I needed a hug,” would cause me pain. So for a long time after, I had to settle for none.

 

MRI'S: Not that bad of a procedure, if you aren't claustrophobic. It was confirmed. There were 2 lumps on my right side that were confirmed malignant. What I was not expecting was this sentence: “Carla, on your left side behind your nipple, are 2 more small lumps that look suspicious to us.”

 

After those two tests, I explored my options. I could do a Lumpectomy, a Bilateral Mastectomy, and also Chemo and/or Radiation. Oh the choices a person has! I researched all my options before my appointment with my general surgeon and decided to have a lumpectomy.

 

I wanted to have a lumpectomy, which I believed would give me the most hope. My thought process was that I would still have my breasts, but they would be a little smaller and the shape would definitely be different. At my appointment though, when I told my surgeon that I wanted a lumpectomy, my general surgeon said, “Carla, the location of the tumors on the left breast make it impossible for you to have a lumpectomy.”

 

Prior to my general surgeon's appointment, my surgeon reviewed my case with a team of medical professionals at the Piper Breast Institute at United Hospital in St. Paul, Minnesota. They concurred that the best possible outcome for me would be a bilateral mastectomy.

 

I now was on my way home to tell my mom, my siblings, my kids, and my bestie - my confirmed diagnosis. A 5 minute drive felt like a 5 second drive. I wasn't prepared to tell the most important people in my life that I had breast cancer. I didn't want to go home. I didn't want to talk to anyone, let alone tell them something devastating, but I was not given a choice.

 

I had to look at my mom in the eye, and tell her that her youngest child had breast cancer. This is how that went...

 

I walked up the stairs and she was in the kitchen. I told her that I needed a hug (yep I knew that this hug was going to cause me excruciating pain, but I didn't care). As I hugged her, I whispered in her ear, “Mom, I have Breast Cancer.” I felt her collapse a little bit, but then I felt my mother's embrace a little stronger. I broke away just a little, just enough for me to look and see her tears, she took my back to hug me again. I heard her whispered words loud & clear back to me: “I'm going to get you through this.” My mom's strength has always been there. I knew that but now I felt it too.

 

So I'm the youngest of seven. My job was to cause balding and graying of hair of my siblings and this was the one time that I didn't want to do that to them but I called each one and man, that was hard. They had so many questions, and I had the answers. I don't know how they felt after the calls. I should have asked them, but I never did.

 

I now had to tell my kids – UGH. They are my nieces & nephews. I never had kids but I considered them my kids and They are my kids! This was SO hard for me. I became an Aunt in 1981 - 3rd grade. I couldn't imagine that I might not be there for them. I looked at their pictures and I started to cry. I have been blessed. I am proud of all of them. There is a song by Taylor Swift that she recorded with The Dixie Chicks entitled ”Soon You Will Get Better.” I want to say Thank You Taylor for giving me the perspective of a child when they know that someone they love has cancer.

 

In 2018, I was bestie with my bestie, Holin, for 34 years. We have been through a lot of stuff and this was no different; perhaps the most challenging to date. I knew that no matter what, she would be there for me. I remembered crying with her. She said, “I will be there for you no matter what.” AND SHE HAS! We just celebrated our 40th bestie anniversary. I know that is not a thing, but to her & I, it is.

 

It's now January 26, 2018. This is the day that I had my bilateral mastectomy. I knew my life changed and it will never be the same. I had a total of 4 surgeries since the first one, as my body was rejecting the expanders. I could feel myself getting more and more bitchy, but could you blame me?? Add to that, my plastic surgeon & I were not getting along and in June 2018, I lost my shit and said, “Take the expanders out!” He did. From June 2018 to November 2018, I needed break from the scalpel and my plastic surgeon.

 

I scheduled my November appointment, with my plastic surgeon. I was in the waiting room, and there was another couple there waiting as well. I could tell that she just had her mastectomy, and you could see the effects of the chemo & radiation treatments. The waiting room was not very big so it wasn't hard to hear their conversation. She worried about her husband and their 3 children and “What are we going to do? The bills are piling up.” He said to her, “Don't worry, I will keep working extra shifts.” WOW!! Cancer is a lot of stress for one person to handle, let alone for a family—young or old.

 

The song “ I'm Going To Love You Through it”, tells the story of a married couple and their kids going through hell and back with her breast cancer diagnosis. This song gave me perspective of a couple & their commitment to each other – NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, they got each other.

I hid my tears for them as I gazed up to the ceiling. I shut my eyes and said, “ God, there has to be an easier way.”

 

My idea came to me at that moment. After my appointment, I called my sister from “my Buick office.” I asked her if the attorney she worked with knew any good patent attorneys. My sister knowing me asked, “Now what are you planning?” and I said, “Find me a patent attorney and I will tell you.”

 

On February 8, 2019, my attorney submitted on my behalf, my sketches & designed breast implant with a nub to The United States Patent Office. In an hour, The United States Patent Office gave me a provisional patent.

 

If you are asking me why is that important to have that back, my answer is simple:

 

How do you view your relationship? Do you like being intimate? What if your partner lost something that was very important to you both in your intimate moments? Breast cancer affects your spouse just as much as the one diagnosed with it. If I need to explain anymore of the why, then I'm guessing you don't understand intimacy.

 

On March 15, 2022, The United States Patent Office granted me my patent. My goal for this patent is to sell it and start a foundation. The foundation is for breast cancer patients that need assistance with their medical deductibles. Just think, if my foundation can take away some of the financial burden, then maybe, just maybe, the patient could focus on healing, being a family, and not stress over the medical bills. And, God willing, have a somewhat more normal life again with all it has to offer.

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